Tinder not working for you? As it turns out, there’s something even better!
Talking to an expert team of engineering students, we came up with a list of foolproof ways you can find love on UoW Buy and Sell.
- Introduce yourself with a dick pic
When meeting someone for the first time, you want to have a solid ice-breaker. She doesn’t know who you are, so naturally, it’s going to be a little awkward. Try using a dick puppet to spice things up while you’re at it.
2. Don’t show your face in your profile
Women love a man of mystery.
3. Strip down to everything but your pants
Because what’s better than having a nearly-naked man looking for a missus brighten up your day while you’re scrolling through Facebook?
4. Make sure to photoshop the jugular
5. Compliment her on her eyes
If you want to be original, try mixing it up with some colourful phrases in broken English, like “your eyes so beautiful.”
6. If all else fails, be persistent
In the words of His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama, “Only effort earns the succ.” (sic)
May Satan smile on you